Short answer: R4R stands for “redditor for redditor.” It’s Reddit’s name for personal ads, and for the boards (subreddits) where people post them, like r/r4r, r/dirtyr4r and r/BDSMpersonals. Reading most boards is free and open, and posting and replying are free with a Reddit account. Each board sets its own rules, and volunteer moderators enforce them.
AseeksB publishes this page and makes a personal ads app, which is compared below. Reddit doesn’t pay us, and there are no referral links. Board details and figures are from Reddit’s own pages on October 7, 2026.
Reddit has hosted personal ads since at least 2010, when r/r4r was created. There are now boards for almost every kind of connection: friendship, dating, casual sex, kink, people over 30, people who don’t want children, and most big cities. Here is how they work, what the main boards ask of you, and how they compare with AseeksB.
The tag puts the poster first and the person they’re looking for second. F4M is a woman looking for a man, M4F a man looking for a woman, and F4F and M4M the same within each. Many boards use T for trans, as in T4M, and A (anyone) or R (redditor) when the poster is open to anyone, as in M4A or F4R. The older newspaper and Craigslist versions, like M4W and W4M, are in our Personals Dictionary.
These are the three boards people search for most. Figures are Reddit’s own, as shown on each board on October 7, 2026.
r/dirtyr4r and r/BDSMpersonals both warn readers not to hand over personal details to someone they’ve just met, because they can be used for blackmail.
| Board | What it’s for | Weekly visitors | Weekly contributions |
|---|---|---|---|
| r/R4R30Plus | Friends and dating for people 30 and over; no NSFW, and you must be 30 or older to post | 86,000 | 2,900 |
| r/cf4cf | People who don’t have or want children | 79,000 | 970 |
| r/Singles | SFW personal ads for adults; posts need 200 characters or more, and external links aren’t allowed | 25,000 | 1,500 |
Figures as shown on each board on October 7, 2026.
Others include r/ForeverAloneDating, r/R4R40Plus and r/FemdomPersonals. Most big cities have their own board too, and our city guides cover New York (r/nycr4r), Los Angeles (r/LAr4r), Las Vegas (r/vegasr4r), Chicago (r/chicagor4r), London (r/londonersr4r), Sydney (r/r4rSydney) and Melbourne (r/r4rMelbourne).
| Reddit personals | AseeksB | |
|---|---|---|
| What it is | Boards (subreddits) on Reddit, each with its own rules and volunteer moderators | A personal ads app for iOS and Android |
| Cost | Free | Free; Supporter is optional |
| Reading ads | Anyone can read most boards without an account; adult boards ask you to confirm you’re over 18 | In the app, after signing up, and only posts whose audience includes you |
| Who sees your ad | Anyone | Only the audience you set by gender and age range; Supporters can add a maximum distance and hide a post from travelers |
| What others see about you | Your Reddit username and post history | Your username, gender and age, plus your location when you post; there’s no profile |
| Before you can post | A Reddit account; some boards require an older account (r/BDSMpersonals: 15 days) or verification (r/r4r) | An account; you can post right away |
| The ad | A title in the board’s format, then free text | A guided post: category, audience, role tags, interests, desires, optional tags about yourself and photos of you, then your own words or an AseeksB Assist draft |
| Posting again | A new post after the board’s wait: 12 hours on r/dirtyr4r, a day on r/r4r, 7 days on r/BDSMpersonals | Renew the same post free every 4 days; edit or delete it any time. One active post free, up to 7 with Supporter |
| How posts are sorted | “Best” by default, partly by votes; readers can switch to “New” | Newest first within each search |
| Finding people | Browse one board at a time | Search by category, gender, age and distance; Supporters can also search by kink role |
| How replies work | Locked posts on the three boards above, so replies go by Reddit private message; some city boards allow comments. Chat settings can limit who reaches you to older accounts or nobody | In the app; only your audience can message you, one message until you reply, then no limit. Supporters can require a photo or allow only Supporters to message |
| Contact details in ads | Not allowed on r/r4r or r/dirtyr4r | Not allowed; fine to swap once you’re talking |
| Photos | Rules vary by board; r/dirtyr4r bans sharing anyone else’s pictures | Optional; every photo must be of you |
| Moderation | Each board’s volunteer moderators, plus Reddit’s sitewide rules | Admins actively monitor posts; you can report someone even after they unmatch |
Reddit details are from the three boards above on October 7, 2026; other boards set their own rules.
Reddit personals are free, and the biggest boards get thousands of contributions a week. Anyone can read them in a browser without installing anything. There’s a board for nearly every niche, from people over 30 to people who don’t want children, and each one is run by volunteer moderators who remove posts that break its rules.
Reddit is a public board. AseeksB is a personal ads app where you decide who reads your ad and who can write to you. Here is what that changes.
Reddit personals are free, public and busy, with a board for almost every kind of connection and rules each community sets for itself. AseeksB is for people who want the same directness, an ad in their own words that someone can answer, with control over who sees it and who can write back. You can use both.
Personal ads in your own words, seen only by the audience you choose. Supporter adds more posts and more control when you want them.
R4R stands for redditor for redditor. It is Reddit’s name for personal ads, and for the boards (subreddits) where people post them, like r/r4r. A tag like [F4M] in the title says who is posting and who they are looking for: here, a woman looking for a man.
Of the personals boards we checked on October 7, 2026, r/dirtyr4r, an adult board, was the busiest, with about 149,000 weekly visitors and 45,000 weekly contributions by Reddit’s own count. r/R4R30Plus had about 86,000 weekly visitors, r/cf4cf about 79,000, r/r4r about 70,000 and r/BDSMpersonals about 46,000.
Yes, for most boards. On adult boards such as r/dirtyr4r, Reddit first asks visitors who aren’t logged in to log in or confirm they’re over 18. Posting and replying need a Reddit account.
On r/r4r, r/dirtyr4r and r/BDSMpersonals, posts are locked, so you reply by private message to the poster. You need a Reddit account but don’t need to join the board, and whether your message gets through depends on the other person’s chat settings.
A Reddit account, plus whatever the board requires. On October 7, 2026, r/r4r required verification to post or comment, r/BDSMpersonals required an account at least 15 days old, and r/dirtyr4r’s rules listed no account requirement. Each board also limits how often you can post: once a day on r/r4r, once every 12 hours on r/dirtyr4r and once every 7 days on r/BDSMpersonals.
Many people use more than one place. Our comparison of Craigslist Personals alternatives checks six personal-ad sites, including Reddit r4r. AseeksB, which publishes this page, is a personal ads app for iOS and Android where you choose who can see each post and who can message you.
Yes. AseeksB is free to download and free to post on, with all key features free. A free account keeps one active post and can renew it every 4 days. Supporter is an optional upgrade that adds up to 7 active posts, advanced search, search by kink role, traveling mode, and more control over who can message you.