A term from swinger sites and apps
On swinger sites, a vouch from a member who has met someone in person that they are real and who they say they are.
| Type | Modern shorthand and terms |
|---|---|
| Category | ENM and kink |
| Historical counterpart | References exchanged |
The idea is older than the sites. In May 1910, a Denver businessman closed his newspaper personal ad with “references exchanged”: people who could vouch for him, offered to a stranger. Swinger sites put the vouching on the profile itself. On Reddit, users bring them up in posts about SDC: one couple wrote that the people they meet “have to have validations like us too,” and another called “a barrier of entry (subscription) and validations” a good thing. Not everyone is convinced: one r/Swingers thread asked whether validations on swinger apps are “kinda pointless.” We have not found a reliable date for the term.
Kasidie has a formal version it calls certification. A certified member or a club owner who has met someone in person can certify their profile, and members can also be certified with a photo of themselves holding a sign with their username and the date, or by meeting Kasidie staff at a Kasidie event.
Validations only help once people have met. Before a first meeting, swingers on Reddit recommend a short video call, and meeting first at a club, party, or meet-and-greet. More in Swinger Apps and Sites Compared and on our Safety page.
The roles people use in kink personal ads, and who they pair with: Kink Roles in Personal Ads.
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How this fits into 170 years of personal ad shorthand: From Object Matrimony to LTR: How Personal Ads Learned to Talk in Code.
All dictionary entries · The Personals Archive · How to write a personal ad
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